Saturday, November 04, 2006

an update...

many dear frens haf come to me askin me for updates on my life... there r so many things to sae but somehow i duno where to start... do u haf e feelin dat sometimes things r beta left unspoken? cos no matter wat u sae, nothin can change... so wats e point of even tokin abt it? but i guess i will share on some things dat might explain e zombie-fied look n sad aura dat those who haf seen me in e past few weeks might haf caught a glimpse of...

u never noe who is wif u or against u... one thing fer sure - guard urself wif all might. dun b too trustin wif pple u deem as frens cos they might juz turn against u e next min to speak evil of u... this is wat my boss told me n i assume he was tryin to hint at somethin... so i beta heed his advice. its weird. when i was wif deloitte, i took almost 2 years to warm up to my colleagues n finally realise dat these r e pple whom i can forge life-time frenships wif... cos of this closeness n bond we share, it split over to my new company where i tot e same principle applies... sadly, e commercial world is not e same. no wonder my managers used to tell me dat in audit, we r v protected in all wayz... n im sure office politics n game-players takes up a v big slice of e protection we used to haf, dat they were tokin abt...

aside from e bloodshed dats goin on in e office, of cos its e job scope issue... im currently handling 2 pple's wk... cos my colleague left n my boss told me to handle my wk as well as e other colleague's wk load. well, gd chance of learnin i tell myself... even though i haf no say in whether i wana take it up or not, or whether it is humanly possible... but hey, all things r possible in Christ. we r victors, we r conquerors!! n i haf been tellin vin i m a lion... cos i wana b Christ-like n He is e lion of Judah!!! y do i need to b afraid??? but of cos, im still human... so at times i might b brought down cos my physical n mental n emotional self cant take it anymore... but i will seek to praise e Lord in ALL CIRCUMSTANCES!!!

Last nite i got 'told off' by a close brother. cos of a harmless comment i put to his sister... his sis has alwayz been unhapi abt a few aspects of him n one dae i asked her to speak to him wif regards to one of e aspects cos i felt it would b put beta to him if its from someone so much closer to him. who noes, he took it from his mum cos his sis was afraid to tell him. then he got upset wif me, makin me feel dat i was tremendously wronged. cos in e first place, i was thinkin for him, dats y i didnt wana tell him myself n since his sis aso feels e same wae as me, its beta fer her to tell him. n aso, i didnt mean it in a malicious way, so y did he haf to take it so hard? but wat m i to sae? he told me no matter wat, he will back his sis up cos they r v close. so does kinship mean dat u protect e person n harm all others who is not family juz cos of some internal thing dats goin on in e family? i duno. someone, explain this sibling thing to me... even love has to be logical n rational, y not kinship? u dun haf to tell me 'yes my sis is wrong' but juz dun blame everythin on me when its alreadi existent in wat she thinks abt u...

think i'll onli share these 2 things in my life... e rest, let's juz keep e door shut on them... as those v close to me know, i can bury things v well. so i can actually alwayz appear v hapi to everyone n nobody would noe dat im actually goin through a v tough time... shianni asked me to blog abt how i truly feel... but hey, do u come here to read abt my sorrows or joy? who seeks to feel upset? everyone seeks to b encouraged, to b lifted up, to read some light-hearted stuff... i guess sorrows juz ought to b kept to oneself... maybe to those few who r seekin to b there fer e other party, then sorrows can b revealed face-to-face... so i'll leave u all wif this verse:

Philippians 1:3-6
3I thank my God every time I remember you. 4In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy 5because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, 6being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.

God has a great plan fer us. a plan to prosper us, not to harm us. take heart cos He noes n He cares n He will bring us through... He will never let us carry too much dat we cannot bear... God is good... ^_^

extracted from Prime Time with God
Dear God, I know that You have a plan for my life. Sometimes, I'm not sure I'm following the right path that will fulfill Your perfect will. I pray that You will give me discernment to make the right choices, and to recognize when You place someone in my life to give direction and point out truths that will prepare me for the path I am to follow and the circumstances I am to face. Lord, please give me strength, grace, and unction from on high to not turn back neither to one side or the other, but to remained focused straight ahead on You. In Jesus' name, amen.