11 nights more... counting down!

it is not easy man... first night i cried myself to sleep and woke up 4 times in the night... 2nd night same thing, except i didnt sleep from 4am to 530am cos im scared of thunderstorms and that was the period when there was a thunderstorm... 3rd night woke up about 3 times and didnt cry so much... last night was great! think only teared abit and only woke up once!!! ^_^

gerry said i sounded pathetic when i told her i was counting down but i said that i really felt very lost... but she is sweet la, always check by me whenever she sees me online... =))) thank God for good friends... He sent joyce and jem to chat with me on the 2nd night, lyn to chat with me on the 3rd night and last night chatted with daryl about worship stuff. tonight going to joyce's house to stay!!!

really amazed by how He helps me tide through this day by day. when i think of vin going away for 3 weeks, i just feel like it is a huge mountain that i cant go past. a tall mountain that reaches to the clouds and can just crush me to bits. but day by day, God just provides the manna, the daily bread, the daily dose of friendships and love to help me get by.

this period also made me remember how much family means to me. how important it is and close to my heart my parents are to me. when i went home on thurs night, i felt sooo good, sooo at home, sooo loved, sooo protected, sooo cared for. in the midst of all my loneliness, my parents are there =))) looking forward to next weekend where i'm going to stay over back home... ^_^

lyn shared with me something that really helps me alot. whenever i think of vin, thank God for him and pray for him and for God's plans and purposes in our lives. i am doing that and it really helps to shift my focus back on God. instead of missing him and translating that into worry, loneliness and sorrow, look to God and just praise Him for who He is and that He will take care of vin cos He wants the BEST for us both!!! ^_^

surrender to Him every part of my life...